Thank you Chris
My friend Chris died on the May long weekend. He was a champion, an inspiration and a hero. He changed my life. He changed a lot of lives.
Chris died of a blood cancer, and while it eventually took his life he battled valiantly, bravely, honestly and humbly. Chris was a 12 year Mo-Bro, raising funds and awareness for men's health initiatives through his annual Movember campaigns. He raised $29, 345 over his years with the charity, but he also captained multiple Movember teams over the years. I joined Movember five years ago, when I found out that they had expanded their organization to funding men's mental health and suicide prevention initiatives. When I found out that Chris was doing one push up per dollar he raised, I said "I'm going to do that too!" For the first three years of my time raising funds and awareness for men's mental health and suicide prevention initiatives I competed with Chris, trying to raise more money than him. I never really told him I was competing with him, but I was keeping a close eye on his campaign in an effort to raise more than him. One year I remember him sending me a text saying: You can't beat me, I want you to win too! In the last couple of years though, we joined forces (it was his idea) and created a Movember team together and tried to bring teachers together from all over the Ottawa Carleton District School Board (in our first year we had over 40 teachers from 20 different schools) to change the face of men's health and last year our team was in the top 3 of all Canadian teams of educators!
Chris inspired me and so many other men to do good for themselves, their families and their communities. This world is a better place thanks to him, and I hope that through this painful loss, his family can keep that in mind.
Chris wasn't an old man. He died way too young. He was awesome! He loved to laugh, and he loved live music, and he loved his job and his family, the way every good friend/dad/husband does. Chris and I weren't very close, but his friendship did mean a lot to me. We shared health updates with each other (his battles with cancer, and mine with depression) checked in with each other periodically and sent holiday messages. It's like I said, he inspired me to do good, because he did good. People looked up to Chris. He didn't have a loud personality, at least not in the places I knew him, but people respected him in a way that was powerful. He was good at what he did, he was humble, he was silly, he was confident, he was warm and just the kind of guy you'd call "an all-round good dude."
His Facebook profile page featured a quote from Bill and Ted: Be Excellent To Each other.
And he was excellent. He was the embodiment of that quote, and he brought it out in the people who knew him.
It was an honor to know Chris, and to be his friend. I met Chris when I started teaching at Hillcrest High School in 2012. We didn't see much of each other at work because we both spent a lot of time in our classrooms. Him in his computer tech class and me in my special needs class, our paths didn't cross, but got to know each other when we'd meet at TGIF afternoons, or staff meetings, or other extra-curricular staff events. He was easy to talk to, had a warm demeanour and a friendly smile.
I only met his wife once and it was at a concert at which I was working security so I didn't have much time to talk...and it was loud, but it was evident how much he loved her in that brief moment. Once, when he sent me an update about his ongoing battle with cancer I told him he was a champion for being so strong and so brave. He responded quickly back to me saying that his wife was the real champion. I believe him. I can't imagine how hard this episode in her life has been and I hope she gets the strength I'm sending her way as my small contribution to her mourning and grieving process. We don't talk about how hard supporting someone with an illness is, nevermind a terminal illness. To Chris' wife: thanks for being everything my friend needed you to be.
I never met Chris' kids...at least not yet. People also don't talk publicly about how hard it must be to see your dad go through this, and to see your dad through this, and to support your dad though this. I'm sending you strength. Your old man was proud of you.
Chris, I'll carry on captaining our Movember team, and raising funds and awareness for men's health. I didn't write this post to grieve publicly, but I wrote it to honour you and your legacy as a champion, and a champion for men's health. I really feel like we were in this together, and while you're no longer here physically, we're still in this together. Your hard work has paid off, is paying off, and will pay off. I'll miss you like crazy. Thank you for inspiring me, and for bringing out the best in me. Movember isn't just a silly fundraiser where dudes grow silly moustaches, it's a movement to make men's lives better.
Chris, you made my life better. Thank you. I love you.
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